Emotional Child Abuse
Is A Global Problem

Emotional abuse starts in the home as soon as the child is born. Its effects are horrendous because it affects the victim for the rest of his or her life. It likens a disease that starts off silently and when it becomes full blown, it holds its victim prisoner. A very young child does not know if it is being abused or not.

Children need to feel secure and loved. They need predictability, structure, clear boundaries, and the knowledge that their parents are looking out for their safety.

An abused child’s world is an unpredictable and frightening place. Whether the abuse is a slap, a harsh comment, stony silence, or not knowing if there will food on the table, the end result is that they feel unsafe, uncared for, unloved and alone.

Examples of emotional child abuse include:

• Constant belittling, shaming, and humiliating a child
• Calling names and making negative comparisons to others
• Telling a child he or she is “no good," "worthless," "bad," or "a mistake."
• Frequent yelling, threatening, or bullying.
• Ignoring or rejecting a child as punishment, giving him or her the silent treatment.
• Limited physical contact with the child—no hugs, kisses, or other signs of affection.
• Exposing the child to violence or the abuse of others such as a parent, a sibling, or even a pet.

Another example of emotional child abuse concerns the use of children fighting in military campaigns. It is a shameful practice that has continued for centuries. What is more shocking is that it is continued today in countries in crisis.

War Child International estimates that about 300,000 children under the age of 18 have been coerced or induced to take up arms.

Amnesty international adds that while the majority of child soldiers are between 15 and 18 years of age, recruitment starts at the tender age of 10. Orphan charity SOS Children's Villagers report 2 million children have been killed in conflict over the last 10 years.

These shocking statistics represent the voices of children who have been scarred physically and emotionally by military conflict.

Emotional child abuse leave lasting scars that effects a child throughout life. It can damage a child’s sense of self, ability to have healthy relationships, and ability to function at home, at work and at school.

Some effects include:

• Lack of trust in relationship. If you can’t trust your parents, who can you, trust? Emotional child abuse by a primary caregiver damages the most fundamental relationship as a child —that you will safely, reliably get your physical and emotional needs met by the person who is responsible for your care.

  Without this base, it is very difficult to learn to trust people. This can lead to difficulties maintaining relationships due to fear of being controlled or abused. It can also lead to unhealthy relationships because the adult doesn’t know what a good relationship is.

• Core feelings of being "worthless" or "damaged." If you’ve been told over and over again as a child that you are stupid or no good, it is very difficult to overcome these core feelings.

  You may experience them as reality. As an adult, you may not strive for more education, or settle for a job that may not pay enough, because you don’t believe you can do it or are worth more.

• You have trouble regulating emotions. Emotionally abused children cannot express emotions safely. As a result, the emotions get stuffed down, coming out in unexpected ways. Adult survivors of child abuse can struggle with unexplained anxiety, depression, or an anger disorder. They may turn to alcohol or drugs to numb out the painful feelings.

• Excessively withdrawn, fearful, or anxious about doing something wrong.
• Shows extremes in behavior (extremely compliant or passive; or extremely demanding or aggressive).
• Child may not seem to be attached to the parent or caregiver.
• Acts either inappropriately adult (taking care of other children) or inappropriately infantile (rocking, thumb-sucking, tantruming).

On the other hand, emotional child abuse can lead to other forms of abuse when the child is an adult.

Most adults do not know they are abusive to their children as they are usually repeating what their parents did to them. Even though they may say,

I’m not like my mother, or father.

They often forget what they (the parents) felt like as children. Under duress, they mimic their own parents’ behavior.

Controlling Parents Can Cause Emotional Child Abuse

Controlling parents just want their children to behave - to be seen and not heard.

My mother had a severe temper and when she let loose, you didn’t want to be in the same county. I would literally shake when she lost her temper. Then I would fantasize that I were on a cloud floating high in the heavens.

I forgot most of the situations that made her angry and the punishment that came afterward. These are things children don’t want to remember and then their emotions become blocked.

What happens later on in life without realizing it is that the child who was emotionally abused is still carrying the abusive situation along with their blocked emotions in their cellular memory which then vibrates out into their energy fields.

Many encounters between men and women other than verbal and physical communication is on a subversive level. In the case of abuse, the victim and the abuser are not conscious of the vibrations that are going back and forth between them. On the subconscious level, it’s something like,

Hi, I’m an abuser.

Oh, hello, I’m a victim.

Okay so let’s get together.

Of course that is not what is said, but that is what is implied in their energy field. They are attracted to each other but in a negative manner. No one really likes being abused, but if that is all you are accustomed to, that is all you know. It is a pattern of behavior that you are not consciously aware of, and so are still behaving as one who is abused through your vibrations.

The abusive patterns of behavior will continue until the abuser or victim realizes it, and will only be released when the behavior is acknowledged and when the abuser or victim is ready to release it.

To find out more about the effects of child abuse, go to:

Child Abuse Effects - Identifies the four types of child abuse, including signs, effects and statistics for each. Details the impact on sexual abuse victims, profiles sex offenders, and provides a forum to write your own child abuse story.

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