Hearing Voices, Very Real!
I am 25 yrs old and hear voices that speak to me 24/7. They are very clear, constant and intelligent people that claim they are dead.
This has been a gradual process that is very real. I do not have a mental disorder, in fact I am well educated in the field of psychology.
I have both my degrees, and am familiar with the disorder schizophrenia.
The very first time I was directly in contact with a spirit that was evil was late on night watching a movie on my laptop. My eyes were uncontrollable, abd went to the keys on the keyboard.
I heard of the ouiji board before, but I assumed you had to willing seek out spirits for them to contact you.
They told me they were my friends. I was immediately curious, but not afraid. How could this be?
After a brief conversation, I asked, "Do you love the Lord?" and my eyes went immediately to the 6. It scared me and I stopped and went to sleep.
Gradually I began hearing the tv talk to me. It seemed that what was said some how was related to me.
Things got really bad when I woke up early one morning and heard a voice as clear as day in my ear. It said, "Can you hear me? She can hear me, she is psychic!" It was uncontrollable. I was terrified.
I immediately started reading the bible: psalms. I started praying and crying.
They stopped, but only for s little while. Over the next couple of weeks things got worse. I started having really bad dreams that were so vivid. Dreams of a man that controlled me, slashed my wrist. I would wake up and be terrified.
My eyes would shift to different areas around the room, reading signs or words uncontrollably. Prayer made it better but it didn't go away.
Almost 3 wks went by, then after a long night of praying to God and reading the bible I woke up early in the morning. I heard a voice, at the time I believed it was God. The voice gave me a feeling of peace. It said your sins have been forgiven. I then heard what I believed to be a good voice. She made me feel calm! I thought I had been saved.
The voice told me that my spirit was no longer trapped in hell. She said she was here to train me to be a servant for the Lord. I trusted it. We became friends. My bad dreams slowly went away. We prayed together every night. She told me to read certain bible verses.
As time went by I started hearing another voice. This one a male. They were always friendly. They told me that people had demons in them that controlled them. They said I had been chosen to help people realize that if they have faith in God, they could free themselves just as I did.
They eventually told me I was an angel for the Lord. They insisted that I refer to myself as an angel for the Lord. They told me to stop talking to certain friends and guys because they had demons in them.
As time went by I began trusting them more and more. They told me I could speak to people in my "spirit voice". I would be out and people would talk to me asking me questions to help them in their life. My voices always told me what to say. They said they were training me to become a stronger angel.
I didn't doubt because of what I had been through. They told me that peoples spirits are trapped in hell and other peoples spirits are in hell. I had been given a gift to speak to peoples spirits, giving them advice and telling them to pray.
Things got really bad when they told me my parents had demons in them. It was so real. My parents appeared to look and act like they had demons in them. My voices or my servants as what they told me to call them told me to pray for my parents. I began praying for them which really scared my parents.
They called the police, which took me against my will to the hospital. I ended up in a mental hospital for one month against my will. I was put on medication but the voices were still there. They told me to continue to read the bible. They said it was God's plan for me to be in the hospital. They said I was here to help other people in the hospital that heard voices and had demons.
The voices told me the staff was evil and they were being controlled. I never lied to my doctor. I told him the voices were from God and they weren't leaving until God said to.
The voices told me to speak to people in my regular voice and then with my spirit voice. I believed they could here me because they spoke back, bur now I know it was my own voices lying to me. Pretending to be other people wanting help. I eventually got out.
As time went by my voices had more and more control over my emotions, thoughts and actions.
Long story short this went on for 3 months until I started to doubt the things they said. I started to withdraw. Thing just didn't make sense. I didn't understand how people could hear me or how they even knew that I was an angel for the lord. The voices told me they loved me, that I needed to have more faith and that I would counsel people that went through what I went through.
They told me in order to help people I had to really experience what it's like to have a demon control you. They began playing mind games on me.
They were no longer friendly or loving. They made me imagine nasty things, they said horrible things to me, the bad dreams came back, they would wake me up in the middle of night, they would make me feel sick, they would sing songs constantly non-stop in my own voice. I couldnt make it stop.
Eventually, they gained complete control over my emotions. When I pray I can't feel anything. They now go back and forth saying I'm an angel for the Lord, then saying I'm crazy and that they have full control over me.
I feel uncomfortable in my own skin. They say they're never leaving. Im afraid of telling my parents in fear they will just put me back in the hospital. I keep praying, but I can't feel, or I feel like they are controlling how I pray. Like my thoughts aren't mine.
This is very very real. It's hard to be afraid because I'm so used to it. It's frustrating and depressing. I know God is my savior and he can make them leave. I accept God as my savior and continue to believe I will be saved.
If anyone is going through the same thing I would like advice or to hear your story. I know I'm not alone.