Learning How To Manage Anger

First of all, before learning how to manage anger, it is important to admit that you are feeling angry.

If you try to push your angry feelings down, they will not go away, and they will keep coming out over and over again and each time more painfully.

Here Are Some Simple Solutions

• When something or someone makes you feel angry, try not to over-react. Breathe and count to 10 and then step back from the situation that is making you angry and ask yourself these questions, "What would I think of someone else if I saw him/her getting angry in this situation?" or "Is this situation really as bad as I am making it out to be?"

• If you can, make yourself think about something else. Turn your attention to some pleasant memory especially if you are in a line-up, traffic jam or whatever is irritating you.

• Try to identify the source of your anger. Are the actions or words of another person hurting you? If so, wait till your anger subsides then try to deal with him/her directly in a peaceful and productive way.

• When you are dealing with another person who may be upsetting you, listen carefully to what he/she is saying to you, and let them finish without interruption. Very often, you will not understand the real message if you "jump in" after a few words. Give others a chance to explain themselves.

1) If your anger is caused by something beyond your control, such as a job lay-off, find out how others have dealt with the problem successfully, and try to follow their lead.

2) Avoid blaming yourself, even if you are angry because of misfortune caused by your own mistake. Learn from your experiences and avoid making the same mistakes again.

3) Reduce your tension with some physical activity. Go for a brisk walk, play a hard game of tennis with a friend, work in the garden, or clean the house.

4) Reduce your stress level with relaxation and deep-breathing exercises. Take up Yoga or Tai-Chi or find some hobby that you enjoy doing.

5) Learn to meditate. When you are alone, practice letting go of your thoughts from your day-to-day concerns and do some menial chore such as washing dishes and get into the moment by only concentrating on washing the dishes. This may make you more able to do the same when you find yourself getting angry.

To learn about meditation, go to benefits of meditation.

6) Learn to laugh at yourself. If you can learn to see the silly side of things, you can laugh instead of lashing out.

7) Learn to trust the abilities of others. Some of your anger may be coming from a lack of faith in the capabilities of other people.

8) Talk to someone you trust such as a family member, a close friend or a member of the clergy for your religion who may be able to see things more clearly and objectively than you do.

When all else fails in learning how to manage anger, look for professional help. If your problems are serious, you may need the help of a mental health professional, such as a psychiatrist, psychologist, social worker, or spiritual counselor. Go to online spiritual counseling.

Return to anger problems from this how to manage anger page