Reality from Fantasy
by Leanne Drain
(Essex England )
Me and My Friend Before The Atmosphere Started
Two years ago I was diagnosed with acute psychosis where you hear voices that no one else hears. They told me it was a mental health problem although something in the back of my mind told me different.
It stayed there for years and still comes by, its like a feeling that I know it was more than mental health. It felt like I could almost tell the future, my future or my friend's future, not sure which one as I was quite confused at the time.
Sometimes, I can still hear the voice and I am on medication to stop it, but the trouble is the voice is someone I know, someone who is still alive, someone who was my friend, who I thought was my friend.
It all started back in the summer of June 2011 we were in the car and Adele came on like someone like you. All of a sudden, my mate who was a guy looked at me straight in the eye and started singing, "Someone Like You to Me". The way he looked at me was a sentiment of love and understanding, of bravery and kindness and of light.
He told me he could pick up vibes, read palms and I believed him, but the signals he was giving me were hard to tell the difference between reality and fantasy.
As I heard his voice one day, a different story came out, he told me he was gay. My world crashed down as I thought this guy has got some kind of feelings for me.
You see at first, he told me he was bisexual then all of sudden he is telling me he is gay. I understand it's a long process, but I just wish I was never in the confusion line as now it has left me scarred for life.
I wanted to tell this story and share my experience as I know how it feels to be in love with someone you can't have and then all of sudden they give you mixed signals and everyone around you thinks you're mad. It is hard that no one believes me, but the advice I would give to you, would be to never give up.
Never for second believe you're a failure, keep going and you will see that the end result is much better than you thought it would be.